January 11, 2017
Hi. I’m 16 days in. Tonight came a turning point. Another one. I guess it’s time to move on my life to a greater degree. I guess I am committed to this not watching t.v. thing, but I literally feel like that poor soul who has no grace for something and is cold-knuckling it. So, maybe I am not committed. I don’t feel like it, and I also know that giving in and watching t.v. will get me nowhere. So, tonight found me in a new place for dinner – on my bed starring out my window eating a peanut butter and jelly sandwich not wanting to do anything but watch t.v. and feeling what a drag I am.
I felt like I should pray afterward to make the most of my time. I couldn’t muster anything worthwhile so I prayed in tongues b/c I didn’t know what to say and just wanted to watch t.v.
I eventually grabbed my Seize the Day book and thought I’d at least read about seizing the day, if I was going to fail at it. I read no pages but did open it and put it by me. I eventually mustered up some gumption and got up to be productive on something. I can check email or come up with a new video for class tomorrow or something, but get up and stop daydreaming and feeling sorry for yourself because you are not watching t.v. The good thing was that I realized the gym will be helpful despite my recent realization that I hate the gym. That may just be an excuse fronting as lazy or bored or uninspired.
I did eventually check email and do some research on nuts and why they are so expensive and what are the best types for you in terms of good fat and mineral content. I also found out a Brazil Nut tree, an excellent source of selenium, is a tree that can live up to 500 – 1000 years, and produces a fruit almost the size of a coconut and can contain 8 – 24 “seeds,” and is forbidden from being chopped down in Brazil. A fun bunch of facts about Brazil nuts!!
I later realized as I washed the dishes that I have gotten to a certain point with my goals of which I have made such great progress that I am at a stopping point I felt. It’s more like I realized that I have to persist in this, in my efforts. There is so much more to be done for all my interests. I just have to persist, one topic and goal at a time, little by little. I'll get there! I'm getting there!!
Get a list. Get a little done every day. Exercise. I just got out of the routine I guess being back at school. There is a whole different momentum now, but making a goals list, however small, is a starting point to accomplish all that I must, and all I wish.
Have also updated one of my audio stories – 1 Gerry. Found myself crying during several parts. Funny that I would feel such things all these years later. So, I have posted that, been inspired by the progress, and have made one goal for tomorrow about moving more on my site.
I am moving on.
Have a good day.
Contact Holly at