Day 6 - ...But God is faithful, who will not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able; but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it.
1 Corinthians 10:14 - I continually am "craving" television. I am I am tempted most when tired. I just want to stop and relax and not even read. Nothing, Today I have been tired a lot. I think it may be in part from constantly moving and doing something, and not really taking any breaks, and not eating as much either so I don't have much energy. Being off sugar too is just making me respect my body more in general, and overall, eat less. It's the postive coupling thing - less sugar, more awareness. Just want to treat my body better.
I'd thought to go for a run today, but was so tired I didn't think I'd make it. After visiting with the neighbors for a long time, I came back to tackle more of the cleaning and organizing my "library" I'd started earlier. I couldn't face any more of that at the moment. I decided to clean and organize my fridge and tidy up my kitchen instead. For some reason, after that, I got a running boost of energy. I headed to the beach.
I was a little sluggish once I got there. I said a little prayer and got out of my car. It was windy. Oh boy. I haven't run my run in awhile. I made it though despite running against the wind (only one way). I was eager actually. It was good I didn't have much in my belly - that makes an already difficult run even tougher - the soft sand, against the wind. Not easy, but it was good. I felt positive afterwards. It's been awhile since I've done that. I have not been able to do it recently.
I have likened, in my mind, running on the soft sand of the beach, as either being what teaching has been to me at times, or what I suspect being a single mother may be like for some. It's so hard that you can barely breathe and can think of nothing else except putting one food in front of the other and just doing what you can to try and make it to the next step.
As I almost got to the life guard stand, the hardest part of the run was over, and I was doing well. I got to turn around and go with the wind, and I got my motor running too at that point so that was good. I was grateful for making it! I thanked God that I appreciate running. I thought of the bible verse - "Run the race that you may win.” That got me going. Then I slowed my mind to think what exactly the verse says only to come to realize that realize I was mixing up two verses. Anyway, what I came to was I was running the race toward the “high calling of God in Christ Jesus.”
I realized in that moment the call of God is high. I realize a high standard of living also comes at a price. Sacrifice occurs. Discipline is necessary to see things through. I am grateful that I have this sacrifice occurring in my life. I am grateful that I have forced this discipline on me. If anyone asked me what I needed to work on personally, it would be discipline, and I have it now. I have realized that too. I love running – I can come to a lot of realizations.
When I was coming home I was tired. I pulled in to get gas and thought of how I’d like to rest and watch t.v. awhile. I was bothered again that here is that craving, again. But, then, when I get home, I get a shower, made some dinner, and was happily listening to some jazz music just enjoying my life. Grace rested on me. A new moment. A reviving of my spirit - no need to collapse on the couch in front of the television. I was revived. I went to the couch with my dinner, but just ate a little and looked at some gardens from a book on my table and socked away some herbal ideas.
I thought to read tonight and have some tea. I have my tea and got a book. It’s not the bible or a religious or spiritual book or a text book. It just a leisurely reading book. I’m goona give it a try, again. Toujours Provence. I have tried to read this book several times in my life. I’ve only ever read and completed a few leisurely books in my life. It's time to read another, and finish it.
Good night. Work tomorrow. Rest.